Marriage and money – a real test of character

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Marriage is like a magnet, it has the power to attract or repel money. Can you imagine how challenging it is for one person to be good at managing money – now multiply that by two! Marriage and money management takes a lot of discipline, consistency and hard work.

Important: How to build a habit of saving and investing.

Just a quick note, marriage and dating are two completely different worlds. Dating is when two independent people are in a relationship but marriage requires two people to unite for a shared vision. This is the reason why marriage is complicated – everything to do with life affects it. It is far from being only love and feelings – it is life and reality.

One of the most important things that forms the basis of any marriage is money management. Marriage is expensive. Children are expensive. Therefore, you can never underestimate the concept of marriage – it is a real test of character.

How does marriage affect your money management?

The transition from dating to marriage can lead to an enormous financial strain. We are going to discuss the relationship between marriage and money.

The wedding

If not properly planned and saved for, a wedding can haunt the new marriage for the first few years of marriage. The main problem with weddings is that they are born out of emotions. Wherever emotions are dominant, there is a chance that logic is disregarded.

Many couples will finance their weddings with debt. This can be a source of frustration immediately after the wedding night. Marriage is more important than a wedding yet majority of couples spend on the weddings and forget about the financial demands of marriage.

Taking responsibilities

Marriage comes with a lot of responsibilities. As a married person, you are responsible for everything about your family. You have to provide for your children and support your partner always – this is what defines a family.

In addition, you are supposed to build the future of your children by paying for their education and everything needed for them to excel. You are also liable for all your family’s mistakes – you are the first line of defense.

Change of lifestyles

When you are single, you can cut on your expenses easily. Depending on the type of partner you marry, your lifestyle may be completely shifted. You can end up making some changes to the way you live in order to accommodate the person you marry.

Moreover, as your family grows, you will need a bigger space and it may force you to rent or buy a bigger apartment. You may also need a bigger car so that your family will enjoy their rides. If you are both working, you may require the help of a maid. All these will require money.

Changes of risk tolerance

When you are young, you can afford to invest in more risk investments. This will be challenging when you are in marriage especially when you have children to take care of. What makes it challenging to take more risk is that you do not want your family to suffer when your investments are eroded.

The more responsibilities you have, the more you are inclined to choose an investment strategy that gives more weight to secure investments. An emergency fund for a married person is supposed to be more than a single person.

The best way may be to take as much risk as possible when your family is still young so that as responsibilities increases, you will have invested enough to allow money to work for your family in your absence.

How to manage money in marriage

Sometimes I wonder why God created marriage and gave different roles to a man and a woman. One key note I learnt about marriage according to God’s plan is that, the two should compliment each other. By complimenting I mean, for marriage to work, there should never be two super powers cohabiting – no competition! Everyone should desire to fill in the gap that is being left out by the other so as to strengthen the shared life.

The financial success of a marriage depends on whether the couple have each other’s back. Who does what? Who is good at what? These are some of the most important questions to ask in a marriage. If one partner is good on budgeting, he/she must take the lead in that area. Another may be very good on investing for the future, he/she needs to oversea that. The person who is more focused on the day to day needs of the family needs to take the lead on short term goals.

In addition, the person who is in charge of investing should choose the investments that are inclined to the overall risk profile of the whole family. Everyone needs to be involved as a team and the visions of the family should be clearly defined and understood by everyone. Whatever role you are taking, your partner needs to be aware of it and the reasons for any action should be clear to both of you.

What happens if married people have a different perspective about something very important?

This is the main challenge that many marriages face. One partner may be a risk taker while the other may be risk averse. One may be an impulsive buyer while the other may be savvy. There are also situations when one is a heavy spender while the other want to invest and save money.

If they all compete, then the personal finances of that marriage will suffer heavily. Depending on who is the most dominant, the personal finances will follow that direction leaving the other partner with bitterness and resentment which can lead to divorce.

In conclusion, it takes two different people complimenting each other’s strengths to be great on managing money in a marriage. If the couple is working together and having a shared vision, they can create enormous amounts of wealth because they can help each other to see what one person may have taken for granted. Marriage and money can never be separated because money challenges are some of the main reasons for divorce.